Eleven's Spooktacular Halloween
by cheri1
Summary: Eleven/River and Amy/Rory. After the TARDIS shows Amy and Rory a Halloween room, the Doctor decides to take them to a Halloween bash like no other.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Amy and Rory held hands while they explored the TARDIS. It was a rest day for everyone. Amy and Rory were amusing themselves by exploring while the Doctor spent the day with his wife. While they were exploring, the TARDIS suddenly blocked their way by moving a wall into the passageway they were in. The wall had a door in the middle of it and the door was decorated with a jack o lantern made out of construction paper.

"I suppose the TARDIS wants us to go in?" Rory said to Amy.

Before Amy could say anything, the door opened by itself with a loud creak.

"My guess is yes," Amy said.

They went inside and stood near the open doorway, staring at the interior in awe. The entire room was filled with Halloween decorations, costumes and knickknacks. At the back of the large room was a rack filled with costumes. Amy headed over to it while Rory examined a collection of jack o lantern candles on a little black table near the door.

"This is cool," Amy said to Rory. "I wonder if this is the Doctor's Halloween collection or something?"

"Lord only knows," Rory said. "As big as this ship is, he probably has just about everything in here."

Amy looked through the costumes. She found a long, black witch's gown and a pointy hat. She noticed there was a black, lacquer folding screen near the rack and took the costume over to it. She changed out of her clothes and changed into the costume. When she was through, she came out from behind the screen and with a giggle walked over to Rory.

"Bah, I am Morgana, the Dark Witch," she said as she wiggled her fingers at him. "I will weave a magic spell and make you my love slave."

Rory chuckled and drew her into his embrace.

"You look very sexy as a dark witch," he said.

"Really? You think I should wear this all the time then?" Amy said coquettishly.

"Most definitely," Rory said before his lips settled on hers.

When they finished the kiss, Amy stayed in his embrace, playing with the back of his hair.

"You know, you oughta put something on so we can show the Doctor and River," she said to them.

"What would I wear?" Rory said.

Amy grinned. She took his hand, kissed the back of it and led him to the rack.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Meanwhile, River and the Doctor were sitting in the console room. The Doctor was telling her about one of his adventures while a CD of Adam Ant's greatest hits played. Stand and Deliver was playing throughout the room while the Doctor recounted his own tale of stopping a highwayman and his gang from robbing a stagecoach in England in the year, 1760. He was embellishing parts of his tale while River gave him a dubious look.

"I find it hard to believe that you managed to fend off fifty men armed with pistols and swords all by yourself," River said when he finished.

"I did. I gave them all a good thrashing," the Doctor said smugly. "Sent them all packing and saved the crown jewels."

"Crown jewels? A moment ago, Sweetie, it was the maharaja's gold that was saved," River said.

"It was both," the Doctor said. "I saved both from being stolen."

River rolled her eyes.

"I suppose the King married you off to his daughter in gratitude then," River said dryly.

"No. But I turned down an offer from the maharaja," the Doctor said.

River was about to tell him he was full of shit when they suddenly heard a low "Ooooo" coming from the back door. Both of them looked up when Amy slowly came down the stairs dressed in the witch's costume.

"I am Morgana, the Witch Queen, fear me!" Amy said when she stopped halfway down the steps and wiggled her fingers at them.

The Doctor and River stared at her for a moment.

"Apparently, Amy found some LSD I didn't even know I had," the Doctor finally said.

"You cannot defeat me, Doctor. I will use my black magic on you and turn you into an animal," the Doctor said.

"Forgive me if I'm not scared beyond all reason, Pond," the Doctor said while River chuckled. "You don't look that terrifying, sorry."

"Behold my power! Rory!" Amy said, calling up the steps.

They watched while Rory came down the steps dressed in a full bodied panda costume.

"Behold! I have turned Rory into a panda and the same fate awaits yoooou!" Amy said, pointing at the Doctor.

"River, help them," the Doctor said to her while River bent over laughing. "These are your parents; maybe you can get through to them somehow."

"You will never escape me, Doctor. I will turn you into…"

Amy trailed off while she tried to think of what to turn him into.

"A what, Witchy-poo?" the Doctor said while River giggled.

"A wombat," River said to Amy.

"Yes! A wombat, I'll turn you into a cute little wombat named Fred," Amy said.

"Thanks, River, for being on my side," the Doctor said while mother and daughter snickered. "And you, Rory, what possessed you to dress up in a fluffy panda suit. Did Amy promise you could use it in the bedroom tonight?"

There was an awkward silence from Rory and the Doctor and River shared a look.

"See, I know these two," the Doctor said while Rory shifted his foot nervously.

He shut up when Amy flew down the rest of the steps, ran over to him and grabbed his throat from behind.

"Submit, Doctor!" she said to him. "Or feel the wrath of the Witch Queen!"

"Oh, eek, save me someone," the Doctor said in a monotone voice while River giggled. "I'm helpless, so helpless, is there no one who'll take pity on me. Hey! Peter Panda, help me out here!" he said to Rory. "I'm being menaced by a non-scary witch and I have only seconds before I become a platypus or something like that."

He smiled when Amy chuckled, put her chin on her shoulder and hugged him from behind.

"Is this part of your fiendish plan to turn me into a Wufflewump?" the Doctor said fondly as he patted her arm.

"Nah, just giving you a bit of love because you deserve it," Amy said.

"So…does that mean Rory can get out of the panda costume now?" the Doctor said.

"Yes, it's hot in here," Rory said, coming down the steps.

He took off the panda head and breathed a sigh of relief.

"Whew, that's better," he said, putting it down by River's chair.

"So what prompted this whole roleplaying thing?" the Doctor said.

"Well, we were exploring and the TARDIS moved a door in front of us and it was filled with Halloween things so we thought we'd dress up and wind you up," Amy said to him.

The Doctor didn't answer and Amy looked at him. He was deep in thought but they could see an impish grin on his face. Suddenly, he leapt up and Amy gasped as he pulled free from her hug. He ran to his console and used the antique typewriter to type in a destination.

"Uh-oh, what's he planning now?" River said to her parents while they watched the Doctor race around the console and change the direction of the TARDIS.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

While the TARDIS was heading towards their destination, the Doctor told River to change into a costume for a Halloween party. He also advised Rory to change his costume.

"I suggest you change into something a bit less bulky, Rory," he said to him. "Otherwise, you'll be lumbering around all night in a hot panda costume."

The Doctor waited till everyone was gone before he made his way to the wardrobe room. While he walked, he smiled and glanced up at the ceiling.

"You thought of the Halloween room because you knew I'd be inspired to take the gang somewhere, didn't you, girl?"

The TARDIS rumbled affectionately and nudged the back of his brain. When he got to the wardrobe room, he looked over the outfits he'd collected over the centuries before selecting an ensemble that resembled the outfit Indiana Jones wore. He adjusted his fedora while he gazed at himself in the floor length mirror and then he headed back to the console room.

By the time he got back, Amy was waiting for him. She was still wearing the witch's outfit, except now she added long, fake, black fingernails to the costume. She stood up and looked the Doctor over.

"Very dashing, you s'posed to be Indiana Jones then?" she said as he walked up to her.

"I am indeed, I'm glad you guessed correctly," the Doctor said.

"Where's your whip then, Indy?" Amy said, pointing to his empty hands.

"I'm not taking one because I'm not going to carry it all day," the Doctor said, walking over to his monitor.

"So…where are we going?" Amy said, coming up beside him.

"It's a planet called Sssss."

"Sssss?" Amy said, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes. Sssss. The race there is reptilian, hence the name. But they're friendly and they love Earthlings. They visited your planet centuries ago and your kind made quite an impression on them. They like me in that they can see your potential so they promote Earth culture. And one of the ways they do that is sharing Earth holidays with the tourists. They have an enormous Halloween bash every year. It's their favorite holiday so they go all out. I thought you humans might enjoy seeing another planet celebrate your own."

"Sounds fun," Amy said. "Nice to know all aliens aren't like the Daleks."

"Uh…no race is like the Daleks," the Doctor said, making a face. "I doubt any species could even come close to being a Dalek, even if they tried. But yes, there are more aliens out there who are fond of humans. I…"

Amy had been staring at the monitor, listening while the Doctor spoke to her but when he trailed off, she turned around and froze. River was standing on the upper steps near the back door. She was dressed in an ankle length, strapless, purple gown and had a pair of purple and silver satin butterfly wings strapped to her back. Amy looked at the Doctor and she could tell he was speechless while he gazed at her.

"D'ya like it?" River said as she came down the steps. "I thought I'd dress up as a fairy."

"You look gorgeous," the Doctor said breathlessly.

River beamed, walked over to him and kissed his cheek.

"What's this supposed to be?" she said, fingering the battered leather jacket he was wearing.

The Doctor gave her a hurt look.

"You're an archaeologist and you've never heard of Indiana Jones?" he said.

"Yes, I have but I didn't think of that straight away so don't be offended, sweetie," River said. "I didn't get the opportunity to watch films when I was growing up."

Amy walked over to her and smiled while she adjusted the wings on her back.

"You look beautiful," she said.

"Thanks, mum, so do you," River said while the Doctor squeezed her hand.

Amy saw someone coming down the steps and looked up to see Rory coming into the room. He was dressed in his centurion outfit and it was Amy's turn to be speechless.

"I thought this would do nicely," Rory said as he walked down the steps. "It fits perfectly and I'm used to wearing it."

"I approve," Amy said, walking over to him and putting her arms around him.

"Ought-oh, we're gonna be here all day," the Doctor said to River while the Ponds gazed into each other's eyes.

The TARDIS landed and powered down.

"Well, have fun role-playing Witch and Roman, we're going to explore Sssss now," the Doctor said, taking River's hand.

"We're coming," Amy said after a long sigh hissed from her lips.

She took Rory's hand and followed the Doctor and River while they walked down the front steps to the front door.

"I'm sorry; did you say the place we're going to is called Sssss?" Rory said.

"Yes. I'll explain while we walk," the Doctor said.

He walked to the door, opened it and peeked out to make sure they were in the correct destination. While they waited on the Doctor, Amy could hear faint screams and moans coming from outside. The Doctor nodded and beckoned to everyone before opening the door wide. When they stepped outside, Amy continued to hear the screams and moans but she realized they were coming from speakers mounted on trees that were scattered around a large open area. There were several Halloween decorations hanging from the trees, some of them animatronic. Amy noticed a couple of animatronic vampire bats hanging from the limb of one of the trees. Both of the bats were flapping their wings and squeaking but when she got a closer look she realized that the bats had bird beaks. When she called the Doctor over and pointed it out, he shrugged.

"They tried their best," he said. "They're not from Earth so sometimes they make mistakes. Close enough."

They walked away from the tree and walked back to Rory and River. Amy looked around and noticed most of the people enjoying the decorations were tall, slim, humanoid lizards. They had purple skin that was streaked with yellow and yellow eyes. Some were naked while others wore long, black chiffon gowns. Amy guessed the ones wearing gowns were the females. Besides them, there were other aliens and humans, alone and in groups enjoying the festivities. Spaced out evenly in the open area were huge bonfires that were burning in the middle of a stone circle. There were booths scattered throughout the festival grounds and a few buildings were on the perimeter. The non-lizard aliens and humans were wearing costumes and laughing and talking while they walked around.

"Those lizard things, do they live here?" Amy asked the Doctor.

"Yes, they're known as the Sissshak. They're very nice people and very welcoming towards humans so you have nothing to worry about," the Doctor said.

As if on cue, an elderly Sissshak turned to look at them and with a warm smile headed their way, his purple tail swished behind him while he walked but he seemed to know how to move it so it didn't bang or trip into anyone else. Everyone stopped when he stopped a few feet from them.

"Are you humans?" he asked.

"Yes," Amy said.

"They are, I'm Gallifreyan," the Doctor said.

"Really? I thought they were extinct," the lizard said, cocking his head slightly while he looked at the Doctor.

"I am the last," the Doctor said.

The lizard fell silent for a moment while he studied the Doctor.

"Sssra-khan," he finally said.

"What does that mean?" Amy said.

"It is the name for him, if I'm guessing correctly at his identity. Among my people he is called Sssra-khan which means Benevolent Traveler. Are you he?" he said to the Doctor.

"I am," the Doctor said.

The lizard's face lit up with delight and he bowed before the Doctor.

"I am Khassstra; it is an honor to meet Sssra-khan in the flesh. And are these your traveling companions?" he said, gesturing to Amy, Rory and River.

"They are," the Doctor said.

"It is an honor and a privilege," Khassstra said, bowing to them.

Amy, Rory and River bowed back and Khassstra beamed.

"Are you enjoying our festival so far?" he said to the Doctor.

"We've only just arrived," the Doctor said.

"Then would you permit me the honor of accompanying you, great Sssra-khan?" he said.

"I would love that," the Doctor said.

Khassstra bowed again.

"Come, my friends, I will show you the festival," he said, beckoning to them to follow him.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

After learning all their names, Khassstra led them to a small wooden booth that was selling apple cider. The Doctor was about to pull out his credit stick to pay for four drinks but Khassstra pointed out who he was to the male Sissshak behind the counter. The man instantly declared that the drinks were on the house and gave five black plastic cups filled with apple cider to the Doctor and his friends. The Doctor thanked him politely but he was upset that his new friend was namedropping to keep him from paying for anything. He hoped he wouldn't alert everyone Sissshak in the area that he was here. The last thing he wanted while trying to enjoy himself was a crowd of enraptured lizards following behind them.

"This is good," Amy said after taking a sip of cider. "Tastes like the real thing."

"We try our best, Friend Amy," Khassstra said. "We don't get everything right but we try hard to recreate Earth culture."

"How come you aren't wearing a costume then?" Rory said. "Everyone except the Sissshak are."

"Well…we tried but Earth costumes did not fit well on our bodies," Khassstra said. "But we enjoy the sight of others in theirs. I like what you are wearing. I'm glad you decided to fit in with the rest of the tourists."

"Wouldn't be Halloween without costumes," the Doctor said.

"I agree. Our kind do not dress up and pretend during festival days. We love the humans' imagination and creativity."

"As do I," the Doctor said.

They stopped by another booth. Beside the wooden booth was a large steel tub filled with apples. A female Sissshak stood behind the booth and smiled at them as they approached.

"Would you like to bob for apples? We have prizes if you can grab an apple with your mouth," she said, pointing to the tub.

"That oughta be easy for you, Big Gob," Amy said to the Doctor.

River and Rory sniggered when the Doctor eyed her. Then a grin spread over his face as he took off his fedora and shoved it into Amy's chest.

"Watch a master at work," he said to her.

"Watch a git at work? Is that what you said?" Amy teased while she held his hat.

The Doctor ignored her as he walked over to the tub. He knelt down in front of it and plunged his head into the water. He rooted around while water sloshed over the sides. Then a minute later, he jerked his head up and proudly showed off the apple stem between his clenched teeth. He opened his mouth and caught the apple and stood up while everyone applauded. He thanked the female Sissshak when she reached down behind the booth and offered him a small white towel. While he wiped the water off his face and hair, she brought up a chart from behind the booth. On the chart were pictures of prizes.

"Look this over and pick what you want and we'll use a matter replicator to make one for you," she said, pointing to the chart.

"Dearest, come and pick your prize," the Doctor said, beckoning to River.

"Ooo, thank you," River said, walking up.

She studied the chart. It was filled with photos of Halloween trinkets and plushies. She chose a black cat plushie that was wearing a purple witch's hat. The Sissshak reached under the counter and put a large metal box on the counter. She used a keypad on the back to enter the number of the prize and there was a hissing sound from inside the box. After thirty seconds, the hissing stopped and she opened a door in the side of the box and pulled out a replica of the cat plushie. She gave it to River and River thanked her while she held it close to her.

"Okay, Pond, money where your mouth is," the Doctor said, turning and pointing to the tub.

"Wait, I never said this was a challenge," Amy said.

She gave the Doctor a peeved look when he made clucking noises. Rory scoffed and stepped up.

"Never send a witch to do a centurion's job, he said as he knelt down.

He stuck his head in the water, rooted around for thirty seconds before coming up with an apple in his mouth. Everyone applauded while he spit it into his hand and stood up. He took the towel from the Sissshak and studied the chart. He chose a torch that had a plastic jack-o-lantern attached to the front. The Sissshak made it and gave it to him. He turned the torch on and the jack-o-lantern lit up from the torchlight. He snorted when Amy held her hand out.

"This is mine, get your own."

The Doctor laughed at the pissed off look on Amy's face. Rory shrugged and turned the torch off.

"I'm not a chivalrous as the Doctor," Rory said to Amy.

"Got that right," Amy said.

"River? Want to have a go?" the Doctor said, pointing to the tub.

"And ruin my hair, are you insane?" River teased. "No, I'm content with my cat. Thank you, Sweetie."

The Doctor shrugged. He retrieved his hat from Amy and made more clucking noises while he put it back on.

"Your hat will be the next thing to get dunked if you don't button it," Amy said while the Doctor winked and walked back to River.

They moved on, following Khassstra while they looked at the scenery and the costumes on the other people.

"There is contest for best costume by the way; it takes place in our civic center in a couple of hours, if memory serves. Are you interested in that?" Khassstra asked.

"I think Rory should enter. His centurion outfit would win," Amy said.

"I think you should enter the contest," the Doctor said to River.

"What about you?" River said to him.

"Nah, I doubt people would know what I'm s'posed to be. Your dazzling though, you'd win first place," the Doctor said.

"Nah, Rory would."

"Care to bet on that?" the Doctor said, spinning around to face her.

Everyone stopped while the Doctor and Amy locked eyes for a moment. Amy finally smirked.

"Okay, I'll bet on it," she said.

"Wait, we never said we were going to enter," Rory said, gesturing to himself and River.

"Doesn't matter, dad," River said. "The Doctor loves to bet on things, we're superfluous at the moment."

"Will you enter if I bet on you?" Amy said to Rory.

Rory thought about that and turned to Khassstra.

"Do you know what I'm supposed to be?" he asked the lizard.

"Not exactly but the judges vote for what they like, even if they don't know what you're supposed to be," he said.

Rory looked at River.

"Wanna do it?" he asked her.

"What if neither of us wins?" River said.

"Then no one profits from the bet," the Doctor said.

River and Rory shared a glance.

"I'll do it if you want to," Rory said.

"Oh what the hell, I'm in," River said with a shrug. "It wouldn't require any effort to stand there and be judged and we might win a prize."

"I'm in," Rory said.

"What's the bet then?" Amy said to the Doctor.

"You win…hmmm…I'll give you a stick with one hundred credits on it and you get to pick where we go next."

"Okay," Amy said. "If you win…"

The Doctor thought about that.

"You…have to cook me a seven course meal and serve it to me and be my footstool while I eat."

"What?" Amy said while River and Rory laughed. "I'm not gonna be your ruddy footstool."

"Okay, okay, make me dinner and serve it to me," the Doctor said.

Amy gave him a wary look before shaking his hand.

"Yippee! I'm gonna get fed!" the Doctor said, pumping his fist.

"Yeah, right, I'm gonna win," Amy said.

"No, you're gonna lose and lose badly and I'll gloat and gloat and gloat," the Doctor said, walking off.

"In your dreams, Time Lord," Amy said, following along behind him.

"Don't worry, this is normal behavior for them," Rory said to Khassstra when he saw the odd look on the lizard's face.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

"Rory, stop it!"

The Doctor looked over his shoulder while they followed Khassstra. Rory was shoving his torch in Amy's face while turning it on and off repeatedly.

"I'm gonna grab it and break it in half if you don't stop it," Amy said while Rory giggled.

"Rory Williams!"

Everyone froze when the Doctor stopped. He turned to Rory and held out his hand to him. Rory put the torch into his hand with a sheepish look on his face.

"While we are here, I expect you to act like an adult and not resort to such childish antics," the Doctor said sternly.

Rory nodded. The Doctor grinned.

"Besides, I'm the leader which means I get to irritate Pond," he said before he shoved the torch in her face and clicked it on.

Rory laughed when Amy flipped him off and tried to wrestle the torch away from him. He passed it to River and grabbed Amy from behind and held her tightly. While this was going on, Khassstra was watching in confusion. River noticed the odd look on his face and put a hand on his shoulder.

"This is normal for them. They like to tease each other," she said to him.

"Tease?" Khassstra said to her with a confused frown. "I'm afraid I don't understand the word."

"They like to play pranks and joke around and be silly sometimes," River said. "Don't you do that?"

"No, my kind are very serious and intellectual," Khassstra.

"He thinks he is but he's really more like this," River said, pointing to the Doctor. "He likes to think he's high-minded but he's more like a big kid."

"I would not have guessed that from the legends," Khassstra said.

"Don't believe everything you read or hear about him," River said to him while the Doctor let go of Amy and walked up to River.

"Speaking of me behind my back, dearest?" the Doctor said to her.

"Only good things, sweetie," River said, patting his head. "Our new friend is shocked that you have the maturity of a nine month old fetus…and the looks of one as well."

"What? I thought I looked older this time around," the Doctor said, patting his cheek. "As for acting my age, I do that often enough so it's nice to act like a child at times. Besides, you have to do that with this lot," he added, gesturing to Amy. "Not everyone is of the higher species so sometimes one must bring oneself down to the lower one's level in order to communicate with them."

He grunted when Amy kicked his bum.

"And sometimes one must kick one's friend's arse to make one's point," Amy said to Khassstra.

"I must admit this is not what I was expecting from you, Sssra-khan," Khassstra said while he watched the teasing.

"Yeah. Wouldn't be the first time someone said that to me," the Doctor said to him. "Don't believe the hype, my friend. I'm not as godlike as people like to believe."

"I'm glad, it makes you more approachable," Khassstra said.

"Yup, we can kick his arse and get away with it," Amy said, coming up beside the Doctor.

"And I can shove them out an airlock and get away with that," the Doctor said to Khassstra. "They just don't realize that yet."

Khassstra chuckled. He had heard stories about Sssra-khan growing up and admired the man but meeting him in person and observing his playfulness made him more likable. He thanked the gods he had a presence of mind to approach him in the first place. He was about to suggest something else they could do when a series of high-pitched shrieks got everyone's attention. They turned and watched while Sissshak came out from behind the trees. They wore cotton, human skeleton costumes that covered their body except for their head, hands, feet and tail. Their faces were covered with white and black greasepaint that resembled human skulls. The lizards began to dance around for the tourists while they threw their arms up and shrieked and howled. Amy made a face while she watched them.

"Yeah, you were right when you said Earth costumes don't look good on your people," she said to Khassstra.

The dancers spun around, clapped their hands once and spun back round again. Then they dispersed throughout the bystanders and grabbed some so they could dance with them. The Doctor was delighted when one came up to him and held out his hand. The Doctor took it and they walked over to an open hand and the Doctor and the Sissshak danced together, spinning around and clapping their hands while his friends watched.

"Hey, do your weird dance," Amy called to the Doctor.

"What weird dance?" the Doctor said, looking back over his shoulder.

"The wavy arm thing you did at our wedding," Amy said.

"That wasn't weird, it was interpretive dance," the Doctor said while he and his partner spun around.

"Yeah and I interpreted it as being weird," Amy said.

The Doctor ignored her and finished the dance. He shook his partner's hand and the lizard went off in search of someone new to dance with. The Doctor came back over to his friends.

"That was brilliant. What else is there to do here?" the Doctor said to Khassstra.

"Well, we have a spook house if you'd like to tour it," Khassstra said.

"Brilliant, lead on," the Doctor said as he took River's hand.

"Wait!" Amy said.

Everyone stared at her when she yelled and held up her hand.

"What?" the Doctor said.

"Just indulge me a moment, yeah?" Amy said, walking over to River.

"Indulge you in what?" the Doctor said.

"Look, I didn't get to raise Melody properly so just let me be a mum for a moment, okay?"

The Doctor shrugged. Amy took hold of River's hand and led her back to Rory.

"Melody?" Amy said to River.

"Yes, mum?" River said when Amy stopped beside Rory.

"Look, I've been watching you for awhile and I know you really like this boy," Amy said, pointing to the Doctor. "But do you know about safe sex and proper protection."

Rory sniggered at the shocked look on River's face while the Doctor's face turned a deep crimson. River chuckled.

"No, mum, what is safe sex?" she said in a childlike voice.

"It's learning when to say no to lecherous people," Amy said while Rory giggled. "We're about to go inside a haunted house. Haunted houses are dark which means it's a funfair for sexual predators."

"Pond…" the Doctor said while River gave her mother a bemused look and Rory giggled hysterically.

"This man may look innocent," Amy said to River. "But he could be a serial rapist and you wouldn't know it."

River looked back over her shoulder at the Doctor.

"A serial rapist?" River said, looking at her mother. "Are you sure? He looks so harmless."

"But that's the problem. Rapists can be anyone and look like anybody," Rory said in a melodramatic voice while Amy giggled. "One minute you're enjoying a ghost train and the next moment your skirt's up over your head, your knickers are off and you're being thrown across a giant jack-o-lantern so the rapist can have a go at you. You must be cautious, daughter. Perverts are behind every corner."

"Will you two belt up?" the Doctor said while River laughed.

"Yes, he could be Jack the Ripper and he'll slit you up a treat the moment you stop to look at Frankenstein," Amy said, wagging her finger at River.

"What is this?" Khassstra said to the Doctor.

"It's called winding me up, my friend," the Doctor said. "Just two cheeky gits having a laugh at my expense."

"But…what if I want to have a go at him?" River asked in her childlike voice.

"Then you must force him to wear a condom," Amy said. "You're too young to have alien babies. You're just a child and therefore inexperienced in the ways of the world."

"Not to mention if he's Jack the Ripper he could perform an unwanted cesarian section on you that will leave you slit from neck to navel."

"Besides, he smells weird, he has shifty eyes and he has a daft fashion sense. And that bow tie…"

"Okay, heard enough," the Doctor said, walking up and taking River's hand. "Pretend Parent Time is over with for now. We want to go into the haunted house."

"Just remember, Melody, no means no!" Amy said to River while she and Rory followed the others across the open area towards a large black building.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

**As they neared the building, the Doctor noticed something peculiar about it. It had HUMAN SPOOK HOUSE above the front door in big white letters but the outside was decorated oddly for a haunted house. Instead of bats or skeletons or zombies, there were colorful birds all over the building. Birds in flight, birds pecking at the ground and then suddenly he came to an understanding when he saw a robin on the side of the building. The robin was holding a lizard by the tail in its beak. He realized that even though the haunted house was based on human ones, they still featured things that would scare the Sissshak. The Doctor said this to Khassstra and he nodded.**

**"When we were on Earth, we observed birds while they ate and noticed some seemed to have a voracious appetite for lizards. We were horrified at first since we figured these primitive lizards were genetic relatives but we realize that these lizards don't have the same level of sentience that we do. Still…we have horror films that feature giant birds attacking our people. They're quite popular. So I apologize in advance since the spook house has giant birds in it and I know those are not horrifying to you."**

**"Nah, it all depends on what you lot did to make the bird scary," the Doctor said. "If presented right, a bird can be just as scary as a monster."**

**They reached the front door, a wooden door painted black. Khassstra opened it and they went inside. The lighting was dim and there were moans, groans and bird chirps. On either side of them was a simulated forest with limbs that jutted out over their heads. They were supposed to go through the center of the artificial forest but they could barely see the way.**

**Amy smirked when she saw the Doctor put his arm around River's shoulder.**

**"Remember, Melody, no means no," Amy said.**

**"Will you shut your trap?" the Doctor said, looking over his shoulder while River giggled.**

**"Just making sure a lush like you doesn't corrupt my daughter," Amy said.**

**"Ha!" the Doctor barked while River laughed harder. "Oh, that's hilarious, Pond. I think you're looking at your daughter with rose colored glasses on," he said over his shoulder while they followed Khassstra through the fake forest.**

**Suddenly, an animatronic robin came out of the trees beside the Doctor. It's head fell forward and it opened its mouth and bellowed "CHEEP!" in the Doctor's ear. Amy roared with laughter when the Doctor gasped and staggered back while the robot robin opened and closed its bloody beak.**

**"Oh, that was brilliant," Amy said while the Doctor gave her a dirty look. "The Oncoming Storm afraid of a robot bird. That alone was worth the trip in here."**

**"Keep running your gob, Pond, and I'll shove your body into the animatronic bird," the Doctor said. **

**They walked on as the bird reset itself inside the forest. There were a few hologram ghosts floating throught the trees, moaning and groaning while the ends of their sheet-like bodies rippled. They passed one set of trees that had huge lizards crawling all over them. The lizards were dressed in their skeleton outfits and they hissed at the Doctor and his friends as they passed by. The Doctor gave them a once over and confirmed that they were real Sissshak and not robots. Then another bird robot came out of the trees and bellowed a chirp at them but this time the Doctor was ready for it. He patted what the bluebird on the head while they passed and the bird reset itself in the trees. While they walked, the Doctor looked back at Amy for a moment before resting his hand on River's ass and patting it. Amy let out a mock gasp of indignation.**

**"Lecherous dog!" she said to the Doctor.**

**"Paranoid In-law," the Doctor retorted while River giggled. "I believe I married this woman which means she's mine to do with as I please, so there!"**

**Amy ran up and snatched his fedora off his head. She exchanged it for her witch's hat and put his fedora on her head. **

**"So there," she said while she caught up with Rory. **

**The Doctor tilted the witch's hat on his head to a jaunty angle before he took River's hand. They walked through the forest, viewing jack-o-lanterns, fake corpses, ghosts and more birds before Khassstra stopped them on the outskirts of the fake forest. There was a large perspex case beside the fake forest that was big enough to accommodate two people. The front half of the case was visible but the second half was covered by black paint. **

**"This is a holographic fear projector," Khassstra said to them. "If you go inside, a machine will scan your memories and project a hologram of one of your deepest fears in front of you. The black paint obscures the fear from view since not everyone wants their fear to be shown. Is anyone interested in this?"**

"Go on, Doctor, show us how brave you really are," Amy teased.

"Why not you, Pond?" the Doctor said. "Aren't you the big, bad Amelia Pond? Show us how brave you are."

"I'll do it if you do it," Amy said.

The Doctor looked at Khassstra.

"Can two people be in this thing at the same time?" he asked him.

"Yes, I believe so," Khassstra replied.

"Come along, Pond, face your fear," the Doctor said, beckoning to her.

"Are we betting on this one as well?" Amy asked.

"No, we're merely going to step inside and see our worst fears," the Doctor said.

"After you," Amy said.

Khassstra opened a door on the uncovered side of the case and they stepped in together. He closed it and they looked out the Perspex while Khassstra stepped back until he was beside River and Rory. Amy frowned when she heard a humming sound coming from inside the box.

"What's that noise?" she said to the Doctor.

"Scanning us, I imagine," the Doctor said.

In front of them was the blacked out area of the box. They couldn't see anything there while the humming continued but then the humming stopped and there was an eerie silence. Then a white mist appeared in the covered side of the box. It formed into a giant cobra and Amy gasped as it hissed and lunged at her.

"Really? You're afraid of snakes?" the Doctor said, bemused.

"I had a cousin that went to India and ended up dead from a cobra bite," Amy said. "It happened when I was four and since then I've had this fear I'd end up the same way."

"So…don't take you where cobras could bite you, got it," the Doctor said as the image dissolved back into mist.

The humming began again.

"I'm guessing I'm being scanned now," the Doctor said to her.

"What's yours gonna be, a dalek?" Amy said.

"Perhaps, perhaps not. I've seen many horrifying things in my travels," the Doctor said with a shrug.

The humming stopped and the mist appeared again. The mist formed an image of two people, a man and a woman. The woman was strapped to a table and the man was standing behind her. As the image became clearer, Amy realized she had seen the woman before when she asked the TARDIS to show her photos of the women that had traveled with the Doctor. The woman had long blonde hair and was young and slim. Her eyes were closed and she looked unconscious. The man was tall and gangly with tousled brown hair. The man was looking at them with cold eyes and an evil smirk on his face. Amy looked to the Doctor for an explanation and was shocked when she saw the anguished look on his face. She gently took his arm and the Doctor looked at her.

"Doctor, who are these people?" Amy said. "That woman was one of the women I saw when the TARDIS showed me women who traveled with you but who is the man?"

"Me. The man is me. My previous life," the Doctor said softly while his eyes were riveted to the image in front of them. "The woman is called Rose. She was…my girlfriend…before I met River."

"What are you doing to her?" Amy said.

"Experimenting on her, changing her into me," the Doctor said after swallowing hard.

"What? Into you? You mean like Time Lord," Amy said, confused.

"No. Something worse," the Doctor said in a hushed voice.

"Doctor, tell me what this means," Amy said, suddenly afraid. "Is this something that could happen to me as well?"

"No!" the Doctor said emphatically. "Not to you or Rory or River. Never would I do anything like this to you," he said, pointing to the hologram.

"Then why is your past self doing it?" Amy said.

"It's…a possible future," the Doctor said. "One I try with all my hearts to avoid."

"Changing us into Time Lords?" Amy said.

"No, making you evil…like me," the Doctor said.

"What? You're not evil," Amy said.

The Doctor lowered his eyes and Amy, now frightened, shook her head.

"No, you're not evil, Doctor. This…fear of yours could never happen," she said, pointing to the fading hologram.

"But it could happen to someone else," the Doctor said. "Rose is trapped in another universe with another version of me, a clone that I gave to her because I couldn't be with her as a human. That version of me is half human and could grow old with her. But…I kept thinking I made a mistake and left her with someone who could be twisted by human emotions and greed and she ends up paying the price for it someday. It's…just a silly fear, Amy. That's all this thing is, showing you one of your deepest fears and fears often turn out to be unfounded."

Amy could tell he was saying this more for his benefit than for hers. It frightened her, this vision of his, even more than the cobra. To think that her best friend and son in law could turn on the people he cared about and corrupt them chilled her to the bone. The hologram was gone now so Amy urged her friend to come out of the box. The Doctor smiled tenderly at her, put his arm around her and kissed her cheek before the two of them opened the door behind them and stepped outside.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

"So, what did you see?" Rory said when the Doctor and Amy stepped out of the box.

The Doctor gave him an odd look.

"You didn't hear us talking?" he said.

"We saw you talking but the box is soundproofed," Rory said. "You looked pale though when it was your turn."

River walked up to her husband and cupped his face with her hands.

"What did you see?" she asked him.

Before he could say anything, Amy spoke up.

"He saw Daleks torturing him, it wasn't very pleasant," she said.

"Yeah, it was quite disturbing," the Doctor said, grateful that Amy came to his defense.

"Well, if any Dalek tries that, he'll be a heap of tin when I'm through with him," River said.

The Doctor nodded and smiled.

"So…you lot want to go in and face your fear?" he said, eager to change the subject.

"I know what my worst fear is and I'd rather not see it," River said.

"Oh? What is that then?" the Doctor said.

River leaned into his ear.

"Getting to the point where you won't remember me," she whispered.

The Doctor's hearts lurched but he kept a passive face and nodded. River studied him for a moment.

"You know what I'm talking about, don't you?" she said softly. "You've already witnessed that moment."

"I have. But I prefer not to dwell on it," the Doctor said.

River nodded and he squeezed her shoulder. He looked at Rory.

"And you? Don't wanna see your deepest fear?" he said.

"My fear is losing Amy, I don't need to see that," Rory said with a shrug.

"So…Amy and I are the only ones ballsy enough to go in. Shame," the Doctor teased. "Khassstra, you?"

"My fear is birds, I also have no desire to see that," he said.

"And yet, you were willing to go in here with us and face the robot birds?" the Doctor said.

Khassstra shrugged and smiled.

"Facing your fears can be a good thing sometimes," he said.

"I agree," the Doctor said. "Shall we move on then?"

The rest of the haunted house proved to be more of the same and they hurried through it. Once they exited the building, Amy pulled the Doctor aside for a moment.

"Giving you your hat back because you look goofy with the witch's hat on," she said, taking the witch's hat off his head and replacing it with the fedora. "And…"

She looked around and lowered her voice.

"I figured you wanted to keep secret what you saw in that box so I jumped in and saved you. Don't worry, your secret's safe with me."

"Thank you," the Doctor said softly.

"And don't worry, you did the right thing," Amy said softly. "I know you, Raggedy Man, you're not evil and neither is this clone of yours. Wherever Rose is, she's happy now so stop worrying."

The Doctor nodded and smiled. Amy pinched his cheek.

"Come on, what's next?" she said to the others.

"Well, we do have a amusement park ride," Khassstra said.

"Like a ghost train?" Amy said.

Khassstra gave her a confused look.

"A ghost train is a haunted house with motorized cars that go through it. You tour the house while sitting down and riding," the Doctor explained.

"No, it's not like that. We love the jack-o-lanterns that humans put out at Halloween so we have a spinning ride based on them. You sit in huge jack-o-lanterns and spin around quickly."

"Ooo, sounds fun," Amy said. "Rory, wanna go and get ill in a jack-o-lantern?"

"I think I will take you up on that," Rory said.

"And you, sweetie? Feel like puking?" River said to her husband.

"Puke? P'ah! My stomach is iron clad. No spinning ride will affect me!"

"Is that a yes, Iron Stomach?" River said.

"Lead on, Khassstra, show us this spinning ride," the Doctor said, taking River's hand.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Khassstra led them towards another concrete building. The building was behind and slightly to the left of the haunted house and was painted a bright orange with a jack-o-lantern face on the side of it. When they went inside, they heard delighted shrieks and saw a huge crowd milling around a steel barricade. Inside the barricade were fifteen pumpkin cars. The back of the pumpkins had a jack-o-lantern face on them while the front was hollowed out and had a bench inside it with a padded cushion. The Doctor examined the cars while aliens and Sissshak hurried to them and got inside. He didn't see any restraints as the people got in and sat down. He asked Khassstra about it.

"There is a gravity restraint that adds extra gravity to a person's body and keeps them pinned into the seat," Khassstra explained. "It activates as soon as the ride begins. Are you going to queue up?"

"Just a moment, I want to see what it does first," the Doctor said and his wife and friends voiced their agreement with that. They walked up to the steel barricade and watched while a male Sissshak walked around the cars checking that everyone was safely inside. While they watched him do that, River felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned around and saw an alien woman standing behind her. The woman was tall and statuesque with a pale white body. She had high angular cheekbones and no nose, only nostrils. She had huge black eyes and long flowing black hair with black antennae on the sides of her forehead. She was wearing a long black dress and to River's surprise, had butterfly wings identical to the ones she was wearing.

"I'm sorry but I couldn't help but notice your wings. Are you dressed as a Begellian?" the woman asked in a high-pitched voice.

"No, I'm supposed to be an Earth fairy," River said. "Are you a Begellian?"

The woman nodded.

"Yes, I am Lura," she said.

"River, nice to meet you," she said while the Doctor looked behind to see who she was talking to. "This is my husband, the Doctor."

"Charmed," the Doctor said, taking her hand and bowing his head to her.

River pointed to the ride and the Doctor turned his attention back to it. The pumpkins were slowly spinning around, staying in place while the people inside whooped and hollered. But then to the Doctor's dismay, the pumpkin kept speeding up until the whole ride was an orange blur.

"Um…is it supposed to go that fast?" Rory said while they watched.

"How fast is it going? You can't even see anything except a blur," Amy added. "If it's going this fast, I don't wanna ride it. I'll vomit in two seconds flat."

"How can people stand it?" Rory said while the pumpkin cars continued to whizz around on metal poles. "How are they still alive? Wouldn't that speed kill them?"

"Perhaps the inside has some sort of equilibrium device that allows them to enjoy the ride without having their brains scrambled," the Doctor said. "The people seem to be enjoying it, I don't hear any screams of terror and vomit isn't flying out in all directions."

The cars finally slowed down after two minutes. The Doctor watched them closely but no one seemed to be staggering and no one looked ill. The Doctor waited till everyone exited the ride area before he headed for the queue.

"Are you crazy?" Amy said to him. "Did you see how fast it was going?"

"Do you see that no one is ill when they came out of the ride?" the Doctor said to her. "There's something to this ride and I'm going to find out what it is. You don't want to ride, stay and watch."

He turned his head around and waited in the queue while the people slowly walked into the ride area. He felt a fingernail in his back and looked over his shoulder, smiling at his wife.

"I figured what the hell, if you're brave enough so am I," she said.

The Doctor took her hand and squeezed it. They went through a gap in the barricade and headed towards a pumpkin near the spot where Amy and Rory were standing.

"Don't vomit on us," Amy said to him as they got into the car.

"Get your chicken bum in here and you won't have to worry about that," the Doctor said to her as he sat down.

River giggled when he stared at Amy and made clucking noises. Then he began to sing to them.

"Amy Pond is a scaredy-cat, she's afraid of a little bat. A cat, a clock, a bell, a tree. Amy's as scared at she can be," he sang to her.

"Yeah, that's really hilarious," Amy said dryly.

"The Doctor is a big douchebag," Amy sang back. "He's a git, a shit and a big toerag…"

"Sorry, can't hear you," the Doctor said when the pumpkin car started to turn around.

"I said, you're a douchebag!" Amy yelled at him.

"Yes, I got that," the Doctor said when the car spun back around and he could see her again. "At least I didn't resort to vulgarities in my taunt."

Amy was about to say something but the car began to spin around so fast that they could no longer see them inside the car.

"Brace yourself for alien projectile vomit," Amy said to Rory.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Meanwhile, the Doctor and River were inside the car. The outside world was now a blur but neither of them were feeling any effects from the spinning car.

"What's going on? I'm not even dizzy," River said to the Doctor.

"I know, me neither. Perhaps we're in a dimensional pocket when we get inside the car?"

"So we're in a completely different dimension from the spinning car?" River said.

"Perhaps, that's how my TARDIS works, you know. And why my TARDIS could be on its side and we could still be upright inside. Whatever this is, I'm glad it works."

"And we can speak normally in here," River said.

"I noticed that as well."

"So…now that we're alone, what did you really see inside that box?" River said.

"Dalek, I told you that."

"No, my mother told me that, you were hesitating and reluctant to speak," River said. "You were telling Amy something but the box was soundproofed. So what did you see?"

"River, I'd rather not say," the Doctor said.

"Is it something to do with me?" River said.

"No. It has to do with a decision I made in the past that I have doubts about."

"And you can't tell your wife?" River said. "You can tell Amy but you can't tell me."

"How about if I tell it to you later on tonight when we're alone in my bedroom so I don't have to rush through the explanation."

River nodded and took his hand. The Doctor smiled and kissed her lips.

"When the ride stops, pretend to be deathly ill for the Pond's benefit," he said to her.

"Oh, you are bad sometimes," River said.

The Doctor winked and nodded. The ride began to slow down and the Doctor and River looked at each other before they leaned on one another. The Doctor pretended to hyperventilate while River slammed her hand over her mouth like she was trying to hold in the vomit. The car stopped and Amy and Rory looked inside.

"Oh, never again," the Doctor said as he tried to stand up.

He shook his legs and he and River held on to each other.

"I think I need the loo," River said as the two of them pretended to stagger out of the car.

"You are so full of shit," Amy said while she and Rory watched them.

"Is that you, Amy? I can't see straight any longer," the Doctor said, looking around in confusion. "My eyes are blurry."

"This act of yours would work if the others were sick but no one is reeling around and acting like they're about to vomit," Amy said.

"Mum, is that you? I see about twenty Amys but I don't know which is the real one," River said, staggering towards her.

"And you're just as bad as he is," Amy said while Rory giggled.

"Dad? Are you there? My eyeballs are spinning," River said, holding onto the barricade.

"I'm here, Melody, just follow the barricade to the opening and you'll make it out," Rory said, patting her cheek.

"Okay, I'll try," River said.

Amy rolled her eyes when the Doctor giggled and held out his hand to River. River took it and the two of them walked normally towards the exit.


End file.
